Harsh words were spoken, Lord. Mean words were said. Emotions were stirred. Pain was inflicted.
He said something, and I reacted. I reacted because I was hurt, not because of what he said, but that he said it, the moment he said it, the way he said it. I didn’t feel understood.
I reacted, and he was hurt. Hurt because of how I reacted, because of what he thought I communicated with my reaction. Hurt because he felt misunderstood.
We fought, and we parted. We were both left hurt.
I know I have made mistakes. I know I hurt him.
So here I am, with pain from both the things he did, but also pain from having done things that hurt him. A mirror up in my face, showing my humanity in all its brokenness.
I am trying to find some way to make it better, to make it less painful.
But there remains only one comfort when faced with my own brokenness: Knowing that Jesus’ love surpasses all of this.
His love is great, for me, and for him.
His love is much bigger than the differences between me and him.
His love is enough.
Enough for me. Enough for him.
I am at the end of my wisdom, stunned and disappointed by my own hurtful behaviour, and by his. The reality of our humanity, oh so disappointingly displayed that I barely know what to do about it. I barely know what to say.
If it weren’t for His love. I know if I don’t do anything, if I don’t know what to do or say, then His love is here. For me. And for him.
His grace is enough.
Enough for me. Enough for him.
I know I have inflicted pain, and my apology won’t make that go away.
But I know Jesus, and I know His grace. I know that even if our humanity acts up and we hurt each other, His grace is enough. For me. For him.
He is faithful. He will never leave me.
When I am wrestling with myself, trying to find the right way, the way that leads me closer to Jesus, then He is faithful.
When I fail, when my humanity takes over and I lash out, then He is faithful.
Because He is always, always faithful.
And His grace will never leave me.
His love will never leave me.
And He won’t ever leave him.
Because of that, we can move forward together.
With these words, there is this song. A song that speaks of exactly that, of that brokenness and pain, of words spoken and questions unanswered.
A song that speaks of the hope we find in Jesus.
