“Think about small children,” the Lord says to me.
“They always want the dessert. They sometimes stubbornly want the unhealthy stuff, the chocolates, the cookies, the cakes, the candies, and don’t want anything else.”
“But as a good and loving parent, you will not just give the child what it wants, right? You will insist that it eats something healthier first, something more nutritious, and not just skip dinner and go straight to dessert. Making sure your child eats the healthy stuff is loving your child well, isn’t it?”
“Yes, Lord”, I answer.
“But children sometimes don’t see how healthier food is good for them, and they sometimes throw a fit because they just don’t want it. They just want cake.”
“Yes, Lord.”
“See, it’s the same with you sometimes. You see cake, and you want to cut right to the good stuff. But I want to make sure you get something more sustainable first, something that will be good for you more long-term, that will build you up and keep you going. All this doesn’t mean I don’t love you. In fact, my love for you is shown in ensuring you get the healthy stuff, too, even if it’s less satisfying in the moment.”
I was convicted.
I had been sitting here all morning, angry and complaining, because I felt like the Lord wasn’t delivering the good promises the way I imagined, and that it feels like it is often such a long journey to get there. Granted, I knew and even then saw that a lot of this long journey actually does me a lot of good. Often, the long journeys, the windy roads, the ups and downs I often dread so much are the times when He refines me, when He teaches me new things that in hindsight I wouldn’t ever want to miss.
But it just feels like it’s all long journeys and windy roads, and I never seem to know what’s around the corner and whenever I think we may have finally made it to the peak, it is usually just another hill in front of me. Or so it feels.
So I complain to the Lord sometimes. I’m not proud of it, I’m just being honest.
I think it’s unfair. When will I ever get to the peak?
Although, since we’re being honest, maybe I don’t want to reach the peak. Because all that comes after a peak is descent. That doesn’t sound great either. Actually, most likely I will be complaining then, too.
Because life really isn’t about reaching the peak. You can’t stay there, because life is a journey.
And sometimes, part of me seems to think that the Lord, the creator of the paths, the director of this journey, isn’t good, because the things He brings into my life aren’t the good I imagined for myself. They aren’t the good I want. They aren’t cake.
But the truth is: The things we want at times aren’t always necessarily what’s best for us. The journeys the Lord takes us on, even if they may be hard and feel unsatisfying in the moment, are often the ones we so desperately need.
The fact that He does this, and lovingly walks these journeys with us, and even let’s us complain while He knows this is our ultimate better, is exactly a testimony of His love.
The more nutritious food, and patiently sitting with your child while it begrudgingly eats it, is a much greater act of love than just giving the child the cake it wants.
And so it is with the Lord: Walking with us through stories that refine us and on journeys that will help us grow, sitting in every moment with us, and helping us receive the more nutritious moments as love, is a much greater testimony of His love to us than just giving us the good things we imagine for our lives.
In His love, He wants more for us than cake. He wants to give us things that will ultimately, long-term, and healthily sustain us, even if it’s less satisfying in the moment.
